Onwards I go...

Just sharing an update that I posted on the Facebook support group from earlier today.

"Just shy of ten month into withdrawal.

For the past week or so I've been feeling tremendous!. Not one for gloating but it's been about six month since I've felt this great and wanted to gloat a wee bit so please forgive me 

Ok, ok my skin is still nowhere near healed. Still going through all the symptoms like flaring, dryness, flaking, redness, etc. However, internally I'm feeling normal again. Perhaps my adrenals have levelled out?. Cause let me tell you it wasn't fun living life like a 90 year old man. I had no energy, suffered terrible insomnia (getting up to six hours sleep a night now), mood was at an all time low as I'm sure most of you can relate too.

Without a word of a lie TSW has been the toughest challenge that I've faced in all my 31 years on this planet.

Who knows what's in store for me further down the line. It really is a cliche but what I have learned is that with withdrawal you really do have to take it one day at a time.

Special shout out to everyone in the group. Without you and your updates, strength and encouragement I would be a lost soul struggling alone with this hell.

So a BIG thank you to everyone who has been there for me. You all have a special place in my heart".

Hugs of the healing variety,

Gary

Awesome and very articulate video

Hi friends,

Just sharing this awesome and very articulate video about topical steroids. The video includes the history of TS & a detailed withdrawal fight from the fellow sufferer who made the video. He goes into great detail with all things related to what we're all attempting and currently going through.

In the mean time I will update my own progress shortly. As always, thanks for stopping by.

Hope all is well at your end.

Gary

*Video update* Closing in on the 8 month phase of withdrawal

Was in a bath this evening and got inspired to make a video with my progress so far. Skin continues to slowly but surely get there, where ever there is...

Had an amazing few days of healing and wanted to share. My last post only a couple days ago was a bit low for me with a really bad flare intact. Feel as though I'm contradicting myself here with this update, ha ha. Ah well. Onwards we march.

Up and down like a roller coaster or shoveling snow when it's snowing I think best describes this maddening condition. Truly mental what little time it takes to get to a calm stage then back to square one with the low times.

Face has healed up nicely since the beginning of my second big flare. Or could it be that I'm a "slow burner?" I pray it's the first. Hoping my symptoms have peaked and can now look forward to the gains that time and comfort offer.

Thanks for stopping by and viewing guys. Appreciate all the support and kind words that each of you have given me over the course of this quite literally, living hell.

Hoping you're all getting there along with me. Keep going! and remember time and comfort will get us ALL over the line to happy times and normal skin.

Healing thoughts and hugs,

Gary

Just shy of eight months

Eight months is just around the corner for me and withdrawal (3.11.14)

Not getting any easier I'm afraid. Entered the dreaded second mega flare that other sufferer's talk about. I know this because when I first started the withdrawal my face was the first area of the body to react. It calmed down as the flare spreaded south as you can see from previous entries in my photos.

About two weeks into the six month stage my face started flaring again getting red with those small, opened wounds. Then the ooze returned. Currently I get one or two clear facial days followed by a flare. The rest of my body has caught up with my face. Hands and legs are the worst parts affected when my face is calm. Right now as of writing this blog entry my face, back of neck, hands and legs are a mess.

INSOMNIA is still apart of my life. Topical steroid withdrawal isn't all about the skin. Internally it has massive repercussions. But you adjust and adapt... strange how this happens isn't it?. When not at work I sleep for 3 - 4 hours during the day after a restless night. Sometimes I get the odd one or two hours nap during the night but in all honesty this is an extremely rare occurrence.

The God damn night times are horrendous as I'm sure your all aware off. I kid myself on by going to bed. Tossing and turning as I scratch myself to pieces. Morning's are always the worst with an inspection of the skin while my life saving epsom salt bath is running.  

The usual withdrawal symptoms are all present. Dry, itchy, red plastic like skin is what it's all about. I have a lump behind each nipple too (got the OK from the hospital, not a serious issue), swollen lymph nodes all over my body... even one each side of my jaw that has left me with bald spots in my beard due to scratching (I try not to shave my beard as it irritates even more if I do so), weight loss no matter how much food I eat, chronic fatigue due to the insomnia, mood swings, etc. The list goes on!.

Got a birthday party on the 8th of November that I'm looking forward too. Had to cancel attending a wedding last month as  my skin was in the pits. Fingers crossed my skin gives me some rest bite for the birthday;)

Below are some graphic images of my facial flares... you've been warned!.

Taking it one day at a time. Hope you're all doing well out there and withdrawal is treating ya good.

Gary

Day 197 - Freddy's Revenge

Ah, the dreaded facial flare has returned...

Thankfully it's nowhere near as angry at present as it has been previously (Day 90). Not wanting to be pessimistic but you should know by now how the nature of this beast works. The withdrawal certainly has a twisted sense of humour with regards to getting healed. It really is one step forward, four steps back.

Insomnia is still my biggest nightmare (pun intended). Was up all night yesterday after work. Slept during the day after my bath today. I've tried to keep my sleeping pattern in sync with the day/night but it is pretty useless. The body has been totally messed up with applying the steroids. I guess I just need to let it do its thing and let it remember how to switch off when its night-time.

Current list of symptoms I'm experiencing:

Intense itch/scratch cycle 

Head to toe full body sweating

Irregular body temperature

Uncontrollable face slapping

Mood swings

Insomnia 


On the plus side with each new passing day I feel like I'm getting back to my old self again excluding skin, obviously. Went out for my first proper night out in six months last Friday (12.09.14). Was drinking cider, shots and strange & wonderful cocktails all loaded with sugar.

I didn't itch on the night thankfully but the next day was a scratch fest as you could imagine. Ended up super drunk as my tolerance to alcohol has diminished! :). I also got a decent nights sleep because of the severe levels of intoxication that I was under, ha.


Here's some pictures from today when I got home from work before my bath below.

So there ya have it folks. Day 197 for me. Wishing you all comfort and healing thoughts at what ever stage you may be at.


Gary 


BONUS PHOTO BELOW

Powerful healing!.

My face as of now while posting this update to the blog. This is after getting some sleep during the day, an Epsom salt bath and relaxing at home #powerfulhealing

Six month milestone in the bag

Hi gang. How you all doing out there today?. That's me reached the six month milestone of my withdrawal. Done a video. Let me know how you're all getting on.

Healing virtual hugs,

Gary.

Day 165

Couple of weeks to go now before the BIG 6 month mark. So what treats has withdrawal been giving me lately. Mmmmmm, Where do I start?.

• Insomnia of the super variety

• Upto 5 micro full body flares daily - the evil ones are at night mostly

• Dry, elephant like skin spreading everywhere

• Irregular body temperature

• Lump behind left nipple

• Nail infections from scratching

• Facebook addiction!, ha ha

Getting all that negative stuff out the way, positively I've been feeling more "human" recently. Been getting out and about more while seeing and catching up with friends, doing sports, gym, etc.

Vanity wise the skin is getting more stronger & thicker with time. My face is healing up the most. If you look back at around Day 90 you can see my face at the worst it's been during TSW.

Someone from the FB group https://www.facebook.com/groups/212642132257327/?fref=nf reckons I may be healing from head to toe which is very interesting. Scratching doesn't break the skin like it used too. Eyebrows are growing back slowly along with my facial hair getting thicker and darker... perhaps the hair on my head will grow back, ha ha chance will be a fine thing!.

All in all I'm much more comfortable (apart from the awful insomnia) compared to the hell that was the early days. Energy levels are increasing with each passing month.

This song pretty much sums up my progress: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1yYDuSf3C4

To all you guys and gals out there going through this, KEEP AT IT!. You've heard it before but it does get better. This is your birth right, normal, healthy skin.

Ceasing putting that poison on your skin is and will be the best but most challenging thing you may ever do in your lifetime.

Just think of all the things you'll be able to do without worrying about your skin.


Below are some images from yesterday (Day 164)

The white stuff is zinc FYI

Thanks for stopping through. I genuinely hope you're all having a calm skin phase.

Remember, KEEP AT IT!

Gary

5 month mark

Hi guys,

Being a tad lazy with this post here so please forgive me!.

Insomnia is my biggest qualm as of late. Skin is slowly getting there with each new day. Face is the  most healed part of me at present. 

I joined a really cool support group on Facebooky a couple of month back now. Posted an update with picts/progress with my now five month old withdrawal (started 03.03.14) from corticosteroids on there the other day. If you want to view it and have a Facebook account then check out the links below to have a cheeky peek.

Would highly recommend that you join the support group as the encouragement and empathy from others keep you going when you're in the low times of the withdrawal phase.

There are tons of people in the group from all over the world who share and give some helping advice with all sorts of questions regarding the often overwhelming effects that withdrawal can have on oneself.

So join up to the Facebook support group if you like;)


Hope your all having a calm skin day.


Gary


https://www.facebook.com/groups/212642132257327/284784008376472/?ref=notif&notif_t=like


https://www.facebook.com/groups/212642132257327/284787041709502/?ref=notif&notif_t=like

ABC 123

123 Days in now. Been catching a bit of the lovely sun we've been getting here in Scotland recently. Sure it makes me itch for a good (bad really) 5 or 10 minutes but, after a bit of time and willpower my body/skin adjusts to the environmental changes to which I can relax too while catching some rays and boosting my Vit D levels... Yassssssssss.

Still experiencing the flare cycle. Still Waking up every morning with super dry skin. Still Not been moisturizing for about 6 weeks now. Still chucking on Vaseline and Sudocrem  when required... sadly, that's every day, ha ha.

So how's your skin been treating you lately?.

Not my face but my feet

This is an arm

Looking OK here

"Prawn" hand?

Hands are flaring mega

I can assure that's ice-cream

:L

Don't ask...

See you later Christian Slater;)

We'll keep kicking on... TSW will be defeated one day...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6tlZzkqfHw

Micro update... Day 110

Get in!. Over the moon and happy as Larry!. Not long in from my first bit of physical activity in what feels like aeons. It's been a while, roughly about 6 or 7 weeks since I last got some decent exercise in. Played a game of 5 a sides with some mates. Your boy lasted the full one and a half hours. Sweated mega buckets during the match. Only itched a couple of times. Some of the fellas asked what was up with my face (had some wounds from scratching) was straight up with them and explained what I'm going through without fishing for sympathy. They seemed to understand and were genuinely supportive.

Unfortunately while driving home I had a good scratch. However, not too much damage was done. As I'm sure some of you know by now, the toasting hot shower was orgasmic!. Will see how I feel in the morning - fingers crossed. Got another match invite for Wednesday evening... We shall see!.

More good news to share... Got two weeks annual leave off from work. Hopefully get some sun on the body while laying out the back.

Thanks for stopping by... hope your skin has been treating you good lately.


Gary

Day 102...

Happy days... bit further into withdrawal now. My skin continues to go through the same cycle as I described in the previous post... Dry skin, flake, feel the itch, scratch, weep/ooze & repeat.

Remaining positive however... Started to sweat from day 99. I've heard this is a good thing as the body is "remembering" old habits and long may that continue. Sweating mostly at night, frustratingly it follows a intense itch fest that can't be helped to scratch for a good wee while. Energy levels are coming back too - YESSSSS!. This is a major boost for me!. Hopefully I'll be able to hit the gym and play footie again soon. It's been far too long. Something like six weeks since I last put my self through the paces of a decent, good old work out. Ironically, insomnia has entered my life again. Sleeping for two hours, toss turn (turn the pillow over to cold side,etc) sleep for an hour or two then scratch for a bit.

If I'm not working I'll sleep for a good portion of the afternoon. If  working,  when I come home I'll jump in a bath, get greased up, eat a couple of bananas then snooze for a bit. I try to stay up but the fatigue kicks my ass and I give in to it easily. I've learned to just listen to the body now as it knows what's more better for me than I do.

Had a massive flare on Day 90. My skin shows rapid healing but. It truly amazes me how quickly the skin can heal after having a bath and a couple of rest days. When ever I flare, I just think of  healing up again in a few days time;)

So without further ado... have a cheeky peek at my "progress" below if you care to dare.

Day 90 - biggest facial flare to date :(

 

Day 90

Day 90 - Left wrist

Day 90 - Right wrist

Day 94 - Amazing healing here :)

Day 96

Day 96 - Old man arm time

Day 96

Day 96

Day 96 - Swelling much?

Day 96

Day 96

Day 96 - Elephant skin time

Day 102 - Lets have a laugh;)

There you have it folks. 102 days are now behind me. Feeling great on the inside... I'm sure the outside isn't too far behind.

Happy healing hugs to you all! - keep going, we will get there in time.


Cheers,

Gary